It’s almost time for the big finale!In honor of reaching the home stretch of my pregnancy, I decided to dedicate this blog post to my pregnancy experience thus far. You know.. Bring the humor out in the situation that is known as pregnancy. Surely expecting ladies past and present can relate and know exactly where I am coming from.
Enjoy my 35 pregnancy thoughts!
1. She sounds hideous.. But really. No matter what size you are, you still feel like a beached whale that no one finds attractive. I like to use the term “uncomfortably cute”.
2.The Struggle is Real. Coughing and laughing can be just as hard.
3. Yay! I did it! I know mom and dad are so proud of me for finally getting completely sober. I am truly looking forward to my first glass of cabernet, oysters on the half shell, tuna sashimi, rare steak, and a side of lobster. It’ll be a cheap meal ok!
4. Food. There are times I am out in a public place that I hope no one saw the massacre that took place between me and my plate. I still manage to enjoy food. Especially when you are craving something and then you get your pregnant, swollen hands on it. It taste 20 times better.
5. Make it stop! If heartburn during pregnancy means you’ll have a hairy baby.. I am about to give birth to Chewbacca! After all the food intake heartburn happens almost daily. I have never experienced heartburn/indegestion until now and it is probably one of my biggest struggles.
6. This Happened! Last weekend Dave finally saw my belly move from Dixon wiggling around and his first reaction was, “I am not saying it’s Aliens, but Alien!”
7. Swag. Swag Everywhere!
8. Fatigue. Why yes I am writing this blog post at 3am. Why you ask? I haven’t a clue. My body thinks it’s 11am for some unknown reason.
9. I don’t even know if I missed a spot. I am seriously going in blind these days. I think that I am doing a great job however.
10. Yassss! I have truly enjoyed bikini season this year.
11. Nope. Bye Felicia.
12. I tried… At least I gave it a good effort. Nothing during the day is so important as naps!
13. Contractions. I thought that I was doing great until 3am last Saturday when Braxton came knocking on my door. Thanks for the preview sir!
14. I’m a turtle. This could not describe all 290435389473764 times I attempt to get out of bed each time any better.
15. You can’t breathe. The baby causes shortness of breath and no matter how little you do, you will be winded.
16. When does this glowing stage begin? Still waiting.
17. Everyday. I could either cry or hate you or do both. David has handled me very well. I can’t be that bad if he discussed wanting to do this all over again within the next year or two.. Right?!
18. Snacks. Snacks always win. I swear you said chocolate donut with sprinkles.
19. Position Change. I am sooo happy David is a hard sleeper. I am constantly changing sleeping positions and trying to get comfortable. My arm falls asleep before I usually do.
20. Mmmm.. Donuts. Chocolate with sprinkles or donut holes with chocolate milk. Be right back.. Running to the donut shop now! A fruit salad will not do.
21. Pretty much sums it up. I am currently still excited about baby kicks.
22. How will I ever know?? Step it up YouTube!
23. My baby wants chocolate cake. Now!
24. Is it that noticeable? I have fallen asleep in mid conversation with David from being so exhausted. This is probably my favorite pregnancy story of ours. David and I were driving around our soon-to-be neighborhood. We were picking out house plans and he asked me to go inside to look at a floor plan or paint colors or something. I told him he could check it out that I trusted his opinion. He looked at me and I had passed out, sitting up in the front seat. He nicely drove me home to let me nap.
25. Not going to lie, it can be an obstacle. I put myself in strange positions to reach my shoe laces.
26. Who needs pants? It’s way too hot and they are getting way too little.
27. They see me Waddlin’. They hatin’.
28. This has to be happening inside of me! One night I peed 7 times. My bladder is Dixon’s pillow, and they cuddle often.
29. Which brings me to my next point.. Never. Pass. Up. A. Bathroom. You can always pee.
30. Exactly. In case you are wondering this is it.
31. Can We Get Some Cooler Weather Already?? I used to think I wanted a boob job until I got pregnant. I don’t know how women deal with this on the regular. I have however found “Don’t Sweat It“. You are welcome!
32. So Far It Works. I cannot put enough lotion on the skin. So far I have been very successful with no stretch marks, but I don’t know how long that will last.
33. Cannot complain. Such a true statement. Through each and everything I have experienced and felt, it is all worth it to feel him move around inside of me, hear his heartbeat, and to think about what’s to come.
34. We are so in LOVE! The mystery of him has kept us on our toes and brought more fulfillment than ever. We are eager and with patient hearts waiting until he makes his grand arrival.
35. This is 28 weeks. I am currently reading books. (Dixon should feel special. I never read until now.) I am trying to prepare myself in every way possible. I have taken classes. Dave attended one and is now confidently prepared to take care of him as am I. I have done everything possible to get moved into our house earlier. I think our move in date will be pushed up by two weeks. Praise Jesus! I am very antsy about getting his nursery ready. The Biddle needs the most perfect nest, and I am going to make that happen danggit. We have two baby showers approaching at the end of September. I have made sure my registry has everything baby needs. (Side note: Target registry items go out of stock rather quickly and need to be replaced frequently.) Maternity pictures are scheduled to remember my first experience of creating our baby boy. I enjoy talking to Dixon and rubbing my belly. He already brings so much happiness to my life. Through it all, I cannot wait to see his tiny face and toes.. and ears.. and mouth, snuggle him, and see David as a Dad. It is about to get real and I am ecstatic!